glittyknittykitty

September 23, 2005

Apple-ologies

From the Skitten for being away from Glittyknittykitty for so long.

I have been a-travelling, here, there, etc. cowering in York hoping my ex-stalker boyfriend won't notice me being corporate, high-flying it in London (and walking 8 miles in high heels, because I felt like I needed the exercise)- but the best thing I've done over the last few weeks? Spent last weekend with Glittr and the lovely DJ Mikey.

We swam (yum yum) in the divine glassy-blue waters of Port Wrinkle. We ate a roast dinner in a Cornish Hamlet near Rock. I went surfing at Sandymouth (Glittr finished her book, the literary girl). We drank white wine spritzers.

And we took some photos. You will see the result of those some time soon. But how we laughed. Can't say any more for now.

But what I can say is: I've got another one!

Yep. I am bad and deserve to be spanked. But Merrell, the mad she-badger, has a twin.

May I introduce Mattie.

- Say Hello Mattie
- Why? Get out of my way, I'm far to busy. I've things to attend to.
- Things?

- Well, you stuffed me in my box with this bird thing, didn't you? It's shat all over my coat and bag. And I'm a doll, so I can't take it to the dry cleaners, can I? Are you going to do it?
- I guess so. Who's the bird?

- I don't know, he doesn't speak, he's made of plush. And he has a marble up his arse, I can feel it.
- You've got your arm up a bird's arse? Do you do that often?

- What sort of question is that? Do I look like that sort of girl?
- Well, no, but...
- I am glamour personified, after all, I'm not named Hollywood for nothing.

- So Mattie Hollywood, who are you really?
- A star!

So there you have it. Merrell, you'll have your hands full with this one.

Posted by scumkitten at September 23, 2005 07:02 PM

Comments

Merrell is jealous and wonders if she can feel the marble up the birdies arse too - she feels like she is missing out on an experience, and being a sensory junkie she is ready to try anything. And I mean anything. Last night I returned a little the worse for wear from the mostly hyped up bad art British Art Show opening which I cleverly managed to blag my way into, to find Merrell on the phone. Talking dirty. I mean really disgusting. Even me, I was shocked. Where did she dredge these terrifying images up from? Hell only knows. Anyway, turns out she is making a lot of money by working as a telephone whore, and apparently is the best of the bunch. Good luck to her I say. I didn't know she was that creative...... She is happy to see her long lost twin, and asked me to say that she is very much looking forward to meeting Mattie. She can call anytime for telephone tips from Merrell.

Posted by: glittrgirl at September 24, 2005 09:52 AM

Oh good lord, is that handcuffs the girl is dangling behind her back?!

Posted by: Alice at September 24, 2005 03:39 PM

Ah no, you're thinking of Merrell there... she's the one with unmentionables in her handbag and a penchant for bondage...

not sure what Mattie will be into... tho' I'm guessing extreme riches and a house in the hamptons won't be too far off the mark.

Posted by: Skitten at September 28, 2005 03:20 PM

I have seen the contents of Merrell's handbag. *Shudders*. For one who looks so innocent she has grisly things in there...... serrated, that's all I am going to say.

Posted by: toxicangel at September 29, 2005 12:04 PM